That sounds really hard. I understand why you're feeling the way you are. It is hard to trust and probably not that helpful to have hope in a situation like this.
Maybe as he is away you have the time and space to think about what actions from him would make a difference to you? I have read on other people's threads (I am still very new here) that starting small is best. Would him phoning a MC himself and making a first appointment without you asking him to do it be meaningful to you?
