Well... this Tinder thing is definitely interesting. Have been chatting with a nice guy who looks a bit like Ryan Gosling... he likes my “sarcasm and my humour” and wants to meet me for coffee. He lives about an hour drive away so definitely doable. Who knows... I have no expectations. It does really feel like I am moving on though. Missing him less and less every day. Really dropping the rope this time, I think.
My sister called me today and told me she had just heard a song, “If My Heart Had a Heart” and said I could have written it. She was on the fence about telling me about it because she didn’t want to “set [me] back”. I listened to it. She’s right. I could have written it...about two months ago. It didn’t set me back.
My H texted me again today about the SA. Wanting to know if we were close to an agreement and he is starting to really panic that he won’t be able to find a house to buy and it has him “shaking at night”. Funny how he still expects me to make things happen for him so he can feel better. He never considered my feelings for all those years and now I am supposed to consider his? Seriously?!?
My SD19 called me tonight. Wanted to know if I thought her dad would help her financially because she was $150 short on her rent. Too scared to ask him. I texted him and he said he didn’t have any extra money to give but maybe by the end of the week. Sigh... she needs it tomorrow. So...I sent her the money. She has rarely, rarely asked us for money. Could have easily helped her if we were still together but this is the new reality. She was super grateful and told me she would pay me back [her mom kept a running tab of IOU’s] and I told her not to worry about it and that I will always help her if I can. She is coming to visit me for a couple days. Probably won’t call her dad. I’m leaving it up to her. Not my job anymore to help him with his relationship with her. He is on his own.
Two more weeks and my kids and I will be in San Diego. Cannot wait!!! Sun and fun!! Anyway...time for bed soon. Love and hugs to you all!!! xo
