Do you guys have any thing that helped detach? It is a hard process for someone I have been with for 17 years and married over 10+ years.
I was with my W for 21 years, married for 19. Was detachment hard? YES! What helped me was to not fixate on the term detachment. I actually think it is a terrible name for it. People think that DBing detachment is the opposite of attachment. It isn't. What helped me was reading a book that called it "Self-differention". Being differentiated in your marriage is the same as DBing detachment, but conveys it in a better way. Look up self-differentiation in marriage, just google it. It is eye-opening.
What helped me? PRACTICE PRACTICE PRACTICE. It is not something you talk about, it is something you do. The more you do it, the better you get at it. It is like golf. Without the green fees.
I will look for that book. Or is it a free download or pdf?
We aren't really supposed to give out non-MWD books here. However, the idea of self-differentiation in marriage is bigger than the particular book I read. Just google "self-differentiation in marriage" and it will bring up a wealth of information on the subject.
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
