So W and I sat down to discuss how we are going to afford D18's college, which as most of you know, will be difficult. After a while, W questions how things have been going with us. I said I thought things were going well, but was still struggling a little with limbo. She said, "I think we've connected deeper over the last month that we have ever. We are having nice conversations..heck we went to the gym yesterday and worked out. We've never done that. Why are you still insecure with this situation? I had to be honest here...I said in some ways I'm protecting myself from a bomb drop or you connecting with someone else. She said "Miler, I've had the opportunity to leave this relationship plenty of times over the last 20 years when things were really bad, I'm not going to do that now." I replied, That must have been hard for you over the last 20 years. She started to tear up and said, It was. I said I was sorry that things have been such a struggle in the past, I'm working to change the things that may have made you feel that way. She shook her head and gave me a forced smile. I then said, I really didn't want things to get heavy, and we don't really need to get into R talk. Things are where they are, and we're taking this time to work on ourselves so that we have the chance to be happy together down the road. She agreed and we moved on to the more boring, but just as tenuous college discussion.
