Apropos of my statement above: "- I trust myself enough to know I can afford to take this emotional risk", part of that trust is my ability to discern what is and what is not helpful for me.
I would still be on the floor in a fetal position if not for the loving support of friends. They are wonderful, especially mutual friends who love W and me, whom I trust not to take sides, and who want the best for both of us. They are gold.
I get different asks from different people. For example, members of W's family, including her mom, have asked me not to walk away. I told her truthfully, to the extent I can, I will not. But ultimately, that decision is not mine alone.
