Sorry to hear about you guys trying and it didn't happen. Consider it a massive bullet dodged. Not only for you two but for the child. For most my life I've grown up without a father figure and there were some hard lessons I learned. I used to wonder what happened and if I was not good enough. My mother never told me the truth. This past summer I took a DNA test. I'm not what my mother has told me all my life. I confronted her about it months ago and she kept saying sorry...
I am trying to shelter my son from a lot of what I had to go through and it kills me that this is happening between W and I mostly because of the kids. I've had friends who were from split homes, I've known divorced men and women with kids and I've seen kids growing up now in split homes and it is always the same. My best friend is dating a lady with a girl who is a teen now. He's been dating the lady for years and her daughter is just now finding the courage to talk to him and let him know how much she hated him all these years. It breaks him. She told him he will never be her father but she still respects him. She still wishes her parents got back together. And here I am almost in tears by this. I reckon I'm partial to it. And there are people out there perfectly fine not having children or never wanting them.
I was like you in the beginning, I think for many of us it starts out like that. Divorce Remedy, right... how to save your marriage! You want to find the answers and turn it around. And turn it around fast.
She already knows that lying to everyone is not okay and that being in the A is not okay. If you want to stand, you set your boundaries and give it time and space.
Not having kids may make it easier but the choice is the same. My W chose to do what she did with kids involved. I don't care if they slowly crawled to that line or rushed and jumped over it, the fact of the matter is the same.
H 49 , W 47 T 23, M 17 S11, S5 BD: 7/18 IHS: 7/18 - 3/19 Physically Separated: 3/19-4/19 Piecing: 4/19 - Current
