Hi Corri. Interesting that you should ask. At first, she seemed the same ole same ole. A couple of things happened, however, later on.

First, I had smoked a pork loin on Sunday, and we ate it last night. It was one of those large pork roasts, not a little tender loin (delicious, by the way). At the end of the meal, which I had prepared by myself for me, W, visiting MIL and DD, W said to me, "DD needs a bath." I responded, "I would be happy to give her one. Would you clean up the kitchen?"
Remember, this has been an issue in the past...she expects me to do everything. At first, she kind of balked, but then MIL chimed in and said that of course they will clean up.

I grab DD and start walking. W sees remainder of pork roast and asks, "what am I supposed to do with this? Slice it? Wrap it up as is?" She seemed totally at a loss. MIL said, "don't worry, I'll take care of that."

Hairdog, with a smile to his voice and to his face, said, "Yes, just let MIL do it. She's not intimidated by a big piece of meat." And Hairdog laughs. And continues walking. He hears a muttering sound emanating from W. "What?" said Hairdog. W said, "I'm not talking to you."

I came downstairs after DD's bath, and, although the plates had been put in the dishwasher, and the dishwasher was running, the kitchen counter was piled with pots, pans, and glasses. Now granted, the dishwasher was pretty full, but I usually hand wash pots and pans which won't fit in the dw. I know that, had I left the kitchen in such a state, I would have heard it from W. I just left it that way.

Rest of evening was spent watching a movie on TV, with MIL and W on couch, and me in chair. Not many words exchanged.

I go to bed first. Later, W comes to bed. She is wearing a shirt.

That's about it. She said goodbye to me this morning (I kissed her goodbye on top of her head) and sounded very cheery. If I come home to a full and clean dishwasher and to a messy counter, I will empty the dw, but I will leave the pots and pans on the counter for her to finish. I'm reserving judgment on whether she's pulling a passive aggressive on me until I get home. If the mess is there, I will try my best to not get angry, and to, instead, look on it as another opportunity for me to show that my boundaries are strong.

Hairdog, chief cook and bottle washer, but not at the same time.