She is just entering the MLC twilight zone. The first 18-24 months is the lead up into crisis and then the crisis will begin. If she is in MLC, she will go into full blown replay and then all hats are off as to what she may or may not do. Right now, she appears to be simmering and is looking for any excuse to validate why she wants out. My advice...don't take her bait for arguments.
You can only take on 50% of the blame for the breakdown of your marriage. Your wife is a big girl and should have been communicating w/you about what was on her mind instead of going out there and sharing her issues w/some other man. You are not a mind reader and unless she told you, you may not have known. So, accept half the blame/responsibility.
The more you have relationship talks, the more determined she will be to run. Keep your conversation very general, i.e., on the kids and current events, bills, etc. No relationship talks!
For now, just leave her be. Focus on you and the children. Detach as much as you can and live your life to the fullest.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
