staying the course

[lost8]

Good week so far...but long road I know. W has continued her course of action and has expressed how happy she is that she is no longer lying to me (albeit a few days lol). I asked about numerous events about her whereabouts and she confirmed that she had lied. She said she had no reason to anymore. She has reconfirmed that I can look anytime that I want at phone, phone records, bank and cc accounts. Her mood has changed she is taking the blame, all of it for the decisions that she made and the hurt that she has caused. I am listening and validating her feelings.

She is talking about things in the future which she hadn't been doing. We talked about addressing the past, hers and ours and she is open to that, together and IC. She wanted to put her ring back on...I didn't stop her. She wanted me to put mine on....already sold (oops), told her I wasn't ready for that just yet.

I'm hanging in there with eyes still wide open. I told her she will never be tracked or investigated again. If I have those feelings of mistrust it will be over, she was at the end of the rope and so were we. We look up or we let go. We agreed that after 20 years we need to communicate our feelings much better, good or bad so that we never get to this point again. I told her that I appreciate how she is putting in the work now so far, she knows she hurt me...bad, she knows I still need time and she would do anything for this to not have happened and to make things better.

Maybe a turning point? I still have the thoughts in my head similar to Steve...am I sure this is what I want? How long will I feel this way? Is it worth it?

More to come...