Miler, hang in there. You are doing a lot of good things. Good job on the validation on the running. And also good job on coming here when you can't sleep. I did that a lot too. I would read sandi's rules and posts, while my WW slept next to me like a rock.
There is light at the end of the tunnel!
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018