In some ways I believe he feels bad for the destruction he’s causing but he is “choosing” destruction and the roller coaster ride rather than trying to work through this crisis in a healthy way.
My ex definitely felt bad. Gave me a lot of concessions in the D. Actually said that she understood what this was doing to the kids and our family's but for once she was going to selfish and do what she wanted to do to make her happy.
Funny how a lot of people comment to me that she doesn't look happy. Maybe they are just blowing smoke up by a$$ but I can see it in her face when I see her, I don't think all her problems have been solved.
I think my H will be a lot like your ex, I’m sure he will be very accommodating in the D. I’m also sure you’re ex isn’t happy. When people have that true inner peace called happiness, it shows. They have an a glow and presence about them. If you don’t pick that up when you see her, she isn’t happy. In fact she’s probably miserable because she risked so much and still isn’t happy.
Unfortunately, I think that’s going to be the future for my H. I don’t wish bad on him by any means but I see a very lonely future in store for him. He’s going to figure out all the things, all the places, all the women, and all the sex don’t equal true happiness.
I’m sure he feels bad, I see him walking around mopping daily. He’s mopping because I’m putting as much distance between us that I can. A few weeks ago he started kissing my check in the mornjng before he goes to work again. This is something he used to always do. I’m always still in bed when he leaves. He leans over, kisses my cheek, and tells me to have a great day. He’s still doing this. My response is always the same, “you have a good day as well.”
Truth be told I’ve been mean to him. I’ve let him know how truly angry with him I am. His response is, “you have no clue how angry I am with myself.”
So I have to get better with the “lovingly” detachment. I need to take the vets advice and stop being mean to him and just act as if I’m happy with life. I need to show him a happy, whole person, in spite of what we are going through. I did a very good job of that yesterday even though he was getting on my nerves. Lol!
Last edited by Living; 02/19/1906:09 PM.
Original BD: 10/26/2017 PA: 10/2017 - 11/2017 Second BD: 09/15/2018 Currently: IHS M: 42 H: 45 S: 22 lives on his own D: 18 away at college S: 15 still lives at home - the only child we share together
