I agree that I have had a lot of issues with drinking. I want to make some things clear. I have not done drugs and no drugs have entered my house. My wife has done some with her friend at the neighbor's house.
Also, the drunk being blacked out is not me. My wife has come home many times passed out. One time passed out in the mudroom at 230 in the morning laying on a puppy pad that was pissed and crapped on. She has been the one being drunk at bars and staying out till 3am. I stay at home and drink beer but never to the point of vomiting or passing out. Most of the arguments have been with kids away or at neighbors house while they sleep (I have video cameras in case there is any movement or noise and can run over at a drop of a dime). I was always the one to go over if they woke up while she just partied and drank. My priority was always father first, "party person" second. The arguments were about staying out late and or passing out or vomiting all over the floor of our bed or bathroom.
I agree that I need to make changes. I have stopped drinking but the wife has not. I have stopped talking to her best friend at all costs. She just started talking to her again. She is still seeing this guy and leaving me and the kids to be with him. she has spent the night with him three times in the past two weeks. My kids keep asking me where she is. I don't have the heart to tell them when she does leave.
Like I said, I know I was messed up. I was drinking too much. I have stopped. She said she got drunk this past weekend on our "date" because I bored her and made her drink. I admit I was nervous as we did not talk at all the past couple weeks and didn't know what to say. So I talked about her master's and such. Evidently that drove her to drink heavily. Like 4 kentucky mules and one long island. Then had that guy pick her up. I was sober the whole time. She don't remember anything she said to me that night.
Again, I am not making excuses. I know I have to fix me. But I don't think she realizes she has a problem at all. I have probably left other details out such as her sending naked pics to supposedly just her best friend that showed up on my computer screen from when she moved the pictures from her phone. She sent a pic of her tits (shirt still one) to my 60+ year old neighbor saying "boobies" These were why snooping started because of how her behavior changed. Not saying I was innocent at all. I am in IC and am starting to go weekly. I hope we can resolve and be back to where we were before the partying started in Aug 2017. It was not sustainable and I kept pleading to stop going over but I then would give in and drink and hang over there since she wanted to. Before Aug 2017, I hardly drank. I know I have to take care of me and I am taking care of my three kids, even when she just leaves and stays the night at another man's house.
