She has a very addictive personality and has been alone her whole life by her perspective. Her parents have always been distant she has never felt loved, said she always thought she was never good enough for me and that I was going to leave her. Yeah she needs more help.
She has wanted to go back to church with me which we had been doing...but man I am at that crossroad....I need space and time. So disgusted by her behavior and lies.
Lost, I hate to say it, but she'll milk this for all it's worth to manipulate you into believing she's ended things with OM and is being true to you. However, it's not that simple anymore........and, in fact, you can use those words to her. "It's not that simple anymore". She is addicted, and if OM is out of the picture, she'll look for OM#2 to get the thrill again. The only way to break the power of this addiction is to go through withdrawals, just like with any other addiction. Then, she can't go around OM again. She can't partake of the forbidden fruit. There's a reason it's forbidden. Until she understands how it works, she may choose not to believe it, but if she stays with you.....she'll need to go through the process. It took me months of going through withdrawals. It's not fun, but it is necessary.
I am a Christian. I believe in repentance from the those who are lost in sin, and from the Believers who have backslid. I know from experience that a WW can attend church services without her heart being changed, and leave there and go contact her AP. Some unrepentant WW's tell their H they want them to go back to church......as some ploy in making the H think she's serious about the MR. No, if she has shown no humbleness, no remorse, and still wants to get aggressive instead of agreeing with the H's terms..........don't buy into it. I'm not saying don't go back to church. I'm just saying WW's will use going back to church the same way they say they will attend IC/MC. It is not a "sign" they are being genuinely honest. Many will say it, but many don't follow through with it.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
