Hi Manta,

I think what you said is fair and reasonable. It doesn't really matter like you say. This is really a low point in life. Probably the lowest that most of us will ever experience. Honestly your situation is probably among the worst I've read about here or anywhere. What kind of woman just abandons her husband like that? Especially a loving, loyal, responsible husband? We can move on but the pain is so deep that we'll never be the same, at least how I see it. I say we should never let anyone undermine our sorrow and grief. A lot of people will try to brush it off or say we deserve better and that's all true, and the truth means something, but there's also this process of grief that can't just be rushed. You sound like you're doing great though. You've gotten through the hardest parts already and your attitude is healthy. You sound like such a great guy. I don't even have any doubt whatsoever that you'll find a loyal partner someday.

I've been going through this a little longer than you. I don't think I'll ever find another man who seems as perfect as my husband was when we first met. Yet I'm talking with a man right now who I like and appreciate in a different way and it may not turn into anything but I can kind of imagine how love can manifest itself in different ways. Sometimes it may not start off as a fairy tale but there may be an emotional or intellectual connection that's much deeper than what we had with the person who left us. Perhaps we don't realize that we can have feelings for someone on a different dimension that we didn't even know could exist. There's a lot left to discover in the world and through connecting with many different kinds of people. It's like we're all on these parallel journeys and it may feel so dark and lonely yet we cross paths with someone who understands exactly how we feel, and feels exactly the same thing at exactly the same time, and they're compatible in other ways as well (age, gender, appearance, career, etc..) and this might be an entry point towards finding love again.

I hope since you and your partner don't have kids (which I knew, by the way!) and since she's the one that left you, then hopefully she won't ask much of you and you won't lose much financially through the divorce. It's so great that you and she don't have kids together. No one else will have to suffer or be disadvantaged for their whole life because of her immature actions except you who is thankfully an adult. Still, you're important, and what she did to you is the lowest, most disgusting thing one human can do to another.