I have a daughter who is 16 (grade 11). I too live in a small town, with little to do with in it. My work is a one hour commute away.
Your questions of why am I here, what is my purpose, should I uproot my daughter.
To the last one, I would say no. I assume your daughter is not wishing to move or made no suggestion to such. That very small community is her home and her school. It is only 2 years until she is 18 and graduated.
I had talks with my daughter and sons about moving and staying. The two youngest were still in school at the time of BD and wished to finish schooling here. And of course this is their home.
They will grow and move away from this little village, their home, and me, setting out on their own grand adventure of life. I believe you and I are close enough to that time, to let our kids continue living as they know until they feel the urge to move. You have freedom of choice, you may just need to wait for a bit longer to exercise it.
To the other questions. Yes work does give one a purpose. Life away from work seems less and does require something, that purpose you are mentioning. Why am I here, I will take as literal, why in this small town as opposed to why am I here (life and big picture stuff). Where one lives or chooses to live doesn’t create or extinguish purpose, that comes from inside. I know you know that.
My daughter got her driver license, and now has a car. I will now see her less than before. This is a difficult and noble purpose, to raise and show our children how to be, to let them be, and still be there for them - even for only 20 minutes a day.
For what it is worth, my kids are becoming less of my life’s purpose, as it should be. I am starting to look to other enjoyments and activities for life’s fulfilment. And I thought finding detachment and indifference was hard.
I think the questions you are considering are normal and need not a definite answer. These questions are more just a response to a life with young adult children. Well actually it is the response to the change of answers. 10 years ago my answers were much different than today’s. In five years from now, I suspect my answer will be different again. My answers are different when considering S21 and S20 vs S18 and D16. I have an idea what it will be like when it is D20, s22, s24, and S25 - my outlook sure looks different.
I suggest to hang in for a bit longer, things are going to change.
DnJ
Last edited by DnJ; 02/15/1904:58 AM.
Feelings are fleeting. Be better, not bitter. Love the person, forgive the sin.
