As I read my state laws - you have to have "Irretrievable breakdown in relationship for a period of at least six months" in order to file for no-fault. I am not sure how that time frame is time-boxed, I assume from BD which was right around new years.
This varies a lot from state-to-state, in some states the two of you have to agree what that date is. In other states you have to file for D before the clock starts ticking. In others if you file for S then that is considered the start date.
Originally Posted by svdad
It seems I am getting conflicting advice here, which I suppose should not be a surprise. Some say 'let her file and do all the work' , some say 'help carry on/move along the D process'.
It looks like you got some clarification from Steve and MF on this but as they said, the DB'ing approach is don't do the work yourself but don't interfere with the process either. It only takes one to D, so you can't stop it. If you try to stonewall her on it it'll just make her angry and more convinced D is the only answer. But if you go along with it and provide her with any info she requests, then it sends a message that you may not want D but you are not going to stop it either. And that removes the pressure from her, and she may very well stop pursuing it (it happens here a LOT).
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If this was a prolonged IHS with anger and kids effected by it, I would be more inclined to hurry along the D.
You've always got that option and sometimes it does come to that. Just make sure that you're thinking about it calmly and rationally and not acting out of anger or frustration or a lack of patience.
