Today we had lunch with her brother in the city. I get along with my brother in law, well, like a brother. Have known him the entire time my wife and I have been together.
Out of nowhere she mentions that we are having problems and are looking to do a trial separation. He is the first person to hear of our troubles outside of us.
My BIL is a great, balanced guy and recommended he catch up with us separately so he can get both sides of the story openly and without prejudice.
I also notice she's not wearing her ring today.
During the conversation I stood my ground and said that I don't think I should be the one to move out if she needs space. I wouldn't stop her from finding space, but I think that I should stay, since she's the one wanting out.
She said that it was her parents living with us right now in our home, and that it would be awkward for just me to be there. I countered and said that I get along extremely well with her parents, and if anything they would give me less pressure than they would to their own daughter.
Still unresolved at this point but I'm glad I at least expressed my view that it should be her to move out. We have another spare bedroom she could move into, but it's completely her choice if she decides move out.
I'm hurting pretty bad about her not wearing her ring. She's at a new internship twice a week with 'like minded people' and I can't help but feel insecure right now.
