So, back from from my cruise. What a terrific time I had! It was great to reconnect with my friend on an intimate level. I’m so happy I reached out to her those several months ago. We’ve always stayed in touch since high school, but usually just holidays and the occasional dinner when I was in her state (my home state).
Guess who messaged “How as your cruise?” before I even got off the ship. Yep. H. I didn’t tell him where I was going, but he spent the day with D19, so I guess she told him. I thought it interesting, but won’t read too much into it. I responded it was great. We’ve had a few exchanges over the past few days about routine stuff, but that’s it.
Both of my kiddos called me yesterday just to chat, and that was awesome. Love it when they do that.
My valentine’s day dinner is postponed. The hostess has been sick. I find that I don’t mind it is cancelled. That feeling surprises me just a bit. I’m content to either go to bootcamp or my usual Thursday Meetup walk. My cruise friend is also separated (her H moved out and out of the country about a year ago). She is the one that wants the divorce as they’ve had a non-marriage for years. She says she finds it freeing that she is not set up for another disappointment this year. Apparently he hardly ever got her anything for any occasion, but it he did, it was perfunctory. That resonated with me. Maybe I’m feeling a bit that way to.
No expectations for anything = no disappointment.
I’m mulling over a few things about myself that might benefit from discussion with my IC. For instance, perhaps explore further what is it about ME that made me so desperate to try to fix our M when clearly H wasn’t on board. I’m not exactly sure yet, because I don’t want to go back unless I have a specific purpose. I need more time. More on that to come in the coming weeks, I’m sure.
This weekend I’m hoping to catch up on everyone’s sitch. In the meantime, spend Valentine’s Day loving yourself and the new discoveries you are making about YOU!
Last edited by job; 02/13/1908:00 PM. Reason: added space between paragraphs
