He asked me would I be willing to put in the work and try to save our marriage together.
I told him that depends on a lot of things and I’m not prepared to answer that question as this time. I told him we both need some time and some space to really think about and evaluate our situation.
(stands up and claps) Well done! You handled that convo perfectly. You absolutely do not want to roll out the red carpet for him and stand there at the end of it with open arms. This is the first of many trips he may make back and forth from the castle (do you know the picnic analogy?) Expect him to pull back and pull back hard. Then he'll reach out, and pull back again, and on and on it will go. You just keep having your picnic. Make him work for it, he's wronged you and it's going to take work to get you back. If you don't make him work he will not have any respect for you.
I agree 100 percent AnotherStander! He’s already proven the back and forth to me.
I’m working on me. He needs to work on him because dude is a mess. Then if he wants me, like you said, he needs to work for it.
That’s why he lost it while I was away. I’ve never done anything like that. Also when he had the PA, I definitely didn’t make him work go get me back.
In fact in the beginning of our relationship, he didn’t have to work too hard to get me. That’s why he probably didn’t feel like he had to work hard in the R. Hard to tell.
Original BD: 10/26/2017 PA: 10/2017 - 11/2017 Second BD: 09/15/2018 Currently: IHS M: 42 H: 45 S: 22 lives on his own D: 18 away at college S: 15 still lives at home - the only child we share together
