3 weeks ago, she gave me the 'I love you but I'm not in love with you' talk.
First please understand that once a woman gets to the point of BD'ing, she's already two feet out the door. Your whole life will get turned upside down and inside out. The good news is you'll come out the other side a better person, and possibly with a new relationship with her. But it's going to take a lot of time and a lot of work. I'm sure right now you are looking for the "magic button" to press and "fix" everything but there isn't one. Read DR and put it into effect. Give your W time and space and work on you. Accept that this is going to take a lot of patience on your part!
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She has indicated that she needs space to decide if she actually want to even try to repair our relationship. We've been to 2 marriage counselling sessions, but as I'm the only one that's been putting in the effort, we're not getting anywhere.
Stop going to MC. It's fine to go to IC, hopefully she will too but that's out of your control. But you should go. She's only going to MC so she can tell everyone she "even tried MC".
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How do I give her space but being in the same house? I don't think it's right for me to have to move out.
NO don't move out!!!!! Don't move out of the MBR either, if she wants to then that's her choice but you stay put. Read Sandi's rules every day. Those are your template on how to give her space while in the same house. Don't follow her around like a puppy dog. Don't be needy. Get out and do things as much as you can.
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Any tips? I've stop all pursuits but I keep having a niggling feeling that she thinks I'm being cold and will feel more justified in her actions.
Again read Sandi's rules. Giving her space does not mean being cold and indifferent. The idea is to LOVINGLY detach.
