Brave Little Gerda Faces the Cutting Winds

[Rita]

Thank you, Job. You always remind me that this is all par for the course; because I think I get re-shocked every time. - I totally agree with you, and in fact I think his proposal makes him look like someone who should not have custody, as all of it is about control and none about what is good for the kids.

That line -- definitely I would try your revision, but there are other things on there -- e.g., taking them on trips for a week, having them on holidays or not being willing to commit to having a suitable accommodation for them in order to be able to have overnights -- that I can't agree to because he is unfit. I didn't put anything about his drinking in my proposal, for example, because my proposal didn't include overnights without this suitable set-up, which I assume is a long time in coming.

But in a "normal" divorce situation, of course the father should have overnights. So I don't know what the court will force, if we get that far -- e.g., if I can prove he is unfit. Apparently it's hard to do. I want to be strategic. Asked S13 last night if he still felt the same about sleeping over at his dad's if he ever moved out, and he was very vehement -- he actually said, "I want to be with you 24-7 unless the court makes me."

I feel like I am not able to protect my kids and it's making me crazy.