Into the Fire (LB55 thread 2)

[LB55]

Why does she automatically get primary custody? It seems like she has this already? I'm young and dumb so please school me.

So a quick education to the process in my state(WA).

She files for D. An initial hearing is set with the court. Usually within 14 days of filing. You get a written response to her declaration. I had a restraining order issued against me as part of this. The judge determined it was baseless but it cost me 2 months of time with my kids. The court then makes decisions regarding kids, living arrangements, support for children and spouse if applicable, and mostly standard stuff like restraints against selling property, etc. this is temporary orders. I am at this point in the process in my sitch.

Then you have a framework for the limbo time between now and final decrees. This can form a large chunk of the final decrees unless there is unreasonable stuff or untenable stuff in there for either party.

You then have to negotiate division of property and visitation and provide the agreement you reached to the court and they will generally go with what the spouses agree upon. If they can't agree, then it goes to trial. At this point a judge decides all point of contention based upon the info they have. They split your household for you and you don't get much say in how it goes at that point. You sign the decree and you are divorced. They try and equalize households financially for the most part, but there are lots of things that go into that.

Then you pay your lawyers $25-75k and start digging yourself out.

Hope that makes sense.