Lost

[Jac12]

Fair enough - I'm a logical thinker so I just figure there is a solution to everything.

I'm trying to realize that that isn't always the case.

I would say most if not all the men here can identify with you on this. We are by nature "fixers", so if there's a "problem" we want to seek out the "solution" and implement it to make the problem go away. One of the hardest things we all go through on this is discovering that there simply is no logic or reason involved. WAS's are running on emotion, and their emotions are constantly changing for quite a while. So they will say something one day and something completely the opposite the next day. They will give you a list of things to "fix" and if you do then they will come up with another list. Everything is in constant flux. I've said before that their minds are like raging storms, hurricane-force winds blowing stuff all over the place, waves thrashing about. We say not to believe anything they say, it's because when their mouths open it's just detritus being ejected from that storm. Often it'll make no sense at all. The one consistency in all of this is they are "done", and that isn't going to change for a long, long time (if ever).

So to keep from going crazy you've got to detach, leave her alone and quit trying to figure her out. Accept that you will never get an answer to "why" this happened, and try to be at peace with that. Use your keen sense of logic to work on YOU- get in better shape, get back in touch with old friends, meet new friends, spruce up your wardrobe, GAL, dive into hobbies. Be the rock and the lighthouse while she's going through her storm!

I understand - nothing she's doing makes sense to anybody but herself at the moment (even that might be a stretch to say).

I've been doing ok considering. Keeping busy and seeing some friends I haven't seen in awhile.

I do like the lighthouse story. Keeps me focused on being strong and looking after myself.