MLC husband

[Rita]

Kate11, I feel like I could have written most of your posts -- at least the part about your fears. This about you imagining all the life events, that is me.

All I can say is that I have had some peace with it now. I wrote about this in a post on my thread last night. The point is that all we can do on this Earth is stay in God's will. God's will is the same for you no matter what your circumstances are, and even when terrible evil is done to you and your children, you can keep walking in the light, and you will have a lot of peace from that, even if you are carrying a heavy sorrow and burden for your kids and for your H. That is a kind of DB that will allow you to not think about strategizing too much.

But then when you get confused, you can use what you learn here to figure out the daily intricacies of survival through this, and to get reminded that there is nothing you can do to change him, when you think you can. These two systems combined have gotten me through almost six years and counting. And I still have hope. Not delusion. Real hope. And I am even looking forward to some time apart if my H ever actually moves his fanny out of here.

What it will do to my kids is extremely difficult to make peace with. But if he wants to go and he doesn't, you could end up in a situation like mine where it starts to seem that it would be better for the kids to have a more peaceful household -- because remember, most kids see a lot of misery and tension when a spouse moves out, but yours will see more peace and they will see you continue to be kind to your H. That is life changing. They will see you standing for your M even when he moves out, and to see how you handle his rejection with grace -- including at those events! And to see you continue to invite him to those events! These things are very powerful acts of mercy and grace for your kids to witness.

There are many many stories of spouses leaving and then returning one day. You can see a lot of testimonies at Rejoice's site. Sometimes reading them is too difficult for me, but mostly I do read them so I will remember that anything is possible esp with God.

As HB always said, where there is love, there is hope!