Hi Kate11,
You've gotten some great advice above, I agree with other posters. I read somewhere once people do this, they've already decided to move out, even though actions and notes and daily interactions seem inconsistent. I want to say that yes, I got a note too. I ignored it. XH then texted it and said that I'd ignored the note and 'wasn't listening that he was moving out'. In my case, it wasn't an R talk he wanted (and we never did) he wanted me to become angry about it and start a fight, which he would then use to justify moving out. Be careful of this behavior. As I became more calm and neighborlike, the angrier he became that there was nothing he could point to to justify his leaving. Then he just found other things to try to get me to blow up about to justify his actions.

The other day he said he'd wished he'd never moved out. He totally forgets how he11 bent he was on leaving! He doesn't even remember the note. It's devastating to you now, but for me it was good, looking back. I couldn't have gal-ed with his very depressed person loafing around, texting all the time.

Last edited by job; 02/07/19 01:26 PM. Reason: added spaces between paragraphs