HI Ovrrnbw, your updates sound about as to be expected at this time. It's a tough place to be in because you know the situation hasn't been fully corrected and yet you have a wife who is present and who is willing to go to counseling and semi-admits to her mistakes but not fully. Perhaps things will just keep going as they are until either you or your wife are finally compelled to make a bigger change. Sounds like you're thinking and you're able to keep re-calibrating your thoughts. I'm sure eventually you'll figure this out and life will be good again. You've been a great help to everyone else here!
