She's trying to get you to do what she wants by threatening to leave, which she's already done. Essentially, she's trying to hold the R up as a carrot to get you to fall in line.
The thing is, she's treating you like garbage man. I'm guessing she wasn't talking to you like that 12 years, or even 10 years ago.
If you were single and some girl you just started seeing piped up out of the blue "I guess I can't count on you for dinner anymore," would you want to continue seeing that girl?
The thing is, you HAVE to be willing to walk away from this R, because this isn't want you want for your life. Even if you start a new R with the same person, you have to bury this one in the ground, man.
She's not the girl you married. When I was going through my sitch, It was explained to me that it looked like my wife, but it was actually an alien that had taken over her body. Use that if you want.
Make sure you're doing the readings. I feel like you're going to be able to make the adjustments.
