Just looking here and seeing September being my last post... doesn't seem that long.
It has been somewhat eventful..
- Been settling into the new apartment, kids and I really enjoy living where we are and the 20min commute to school/work has not been any issue. It great to be able to walk to meet friends and if we decide to have a few drinks I don't have to worry getting home. Joining more groups and meeting more people has been cool, I've also changed my thought process while doing this because I used to be the introverted kind that went to these kind of things wondering if anyone is going to like me but now I go wondering if I will like any of them.. it's very refreshing going and not caring if I meet people I might like to see again, just meeting people for that one meeting or those that I just see once a month at the meetings.
- Had bought a new (to me) car once the house sale was completed, unfortunately had a trucker that decided he wanted the lane I was in and squeezed me against a wall. Car was written off less than 2 months after I bought it. Several weeks of dealing with insurances but got 'another' new car just before the holidays.
- Kids were away with their mother for the holidays so went off to the sun myself, played a lot of golf with my father and had a great couple of weeks. Only got talking to the kids twice and mostly only to D6 but it was better than I expected. Had one interesting moment while talking to my daughter when the daughter of my fathers girlfriend came over and said hello while I was on the phone, and shortly after, I saw MIL come past the phone and stand just out of shot...
- Interactions with W have been mixed. She has been very negative about my move, regularly stating to the kids that it is a bad idea, that I have moved too far away from her. (20 mins up the road). D6 has speech therapy at the moment and W meets us there for that so we have 45mins sitting in the waiting room with some small talk. 3 times she says that she is going to get a coffee from the bakery, everytime asking if I want something. D6 and I have breakfast date before the session so I decline. W has then sat down and chatted before going later, then the last 2 weeks hasn't gone at all, has just sat down and chatted. I still don't trust it is genuine as 1 thing I have learnt from my coach is that it's highly likely W likes attention and the 'chase' but when she has someone, she seeks that attention again. I kinda see it because she claims she is with OM but no one really sees them together and the kids hardly ever see him. Not my circus, though I did explain to W that if she is with him, she should respect him more than she did me and quit causing drama in my life. That I'm not interested in someone that claims to be in a relationship but seeks attention from other men. After the no consequences quote, her latest was "lying damages relationships", (it was based on S10 forgetting to do some homework and the consequence of that being he had detention). W compares this to lying since he didn't write it in his book and didn't tell me when I asked him if he had done all his homework. I explained that he had freedom to not write it in his book but if he forgets then or 'lies' to me then he has actions to take to regain the trust agreement we had. This is when she came out with the lying damages relationships comment.
- I enjoy the life I have, I am doing great things with my kids, we have travelled and really enjoy our time together. As I have seen written here, I don't have the quantity so I make the time quality. There is a friend at work who has been going through a tough time with his W, tells me he is envious of the life I have, being able to do what I want when I want and not having someone complaining that the things he does are not good enough. They are working things through and so far they seem to be better. I tell him that it's not the life I planned to have but it's the one I have now and it's time to make the best of it.
- Work is going well in that I am have been doing courses that will up the level of responsibility I have, I guess a little bit of climbing the ladder. I am also getting regularly head hunted and enquiries from recruiters from many countries even though I am not actively looking for anything else. I can't relocate at the moment but it's still positive feedback that my job and experience are growing and being recognised.
Well that's about it for now, I know there are many struggling, the best advice I can give is live your life. If people want to be part of it, they will and if they don't, live your life in the way you can enjoy it. We only have the one here so get out there and live it...
