Gordie 23 one year after she dropped the D

[roist]

Gordie,

I too believe it is a promising sign, on many fronts:

For you: as has been said she has opened up even if only a small bit about a painful period of her life. So at some level she has a deep connection to you. She could have gone alone, but chose (for her reasons) for you to be there. Although those reasons could be selfish and self-centered, she still chose for you to go. For whatever reason she wanted you to be with her. Her reasons may or may not surface given time, but you can look at it as a huge positive. Be grateful for it but don't dwell on it.

For her: This shows she is thinking about something painful from her childhood. She is facing it and not running/hiding. That is a good start to getting past it. she needed/wanted support and you were there for her. The important part of that is that in that moment she let down her defences and let you in. She showed her emotions. Some WAS do similar stuff to seek pity as in they have such problems it excuses their behaviour; I do not sense that it in this case.

For ye: holding hands even in silence is significant. Not only is it a sign of connection, but it also prolonged the moment she shared with you.


For me the best way to respond would be to thank her for sharing a difficult part of her life and to state that if she ever wants to discuss it you are there. Then leave her take the next step. No pressure, no inquiring, nothing. In rebuilding a R you need to place strong foundations one piece at a time. This piece is hers and you cannot build on it. Only she can do so without it collapsing. So continue what you are doing working on other parts of that foundation.

Best wishes