Feeling a bit of an emotional train wreck right now. Sitting at home by myself, W is at work. She's normally home on Fridays. All this sudden resentment this past week has been extremely difficult when I have done nothing but back away from her. I'm thinking that me backing away and giving her space is causing all this anger that she has towards me to come out and be free. I've been handling the torment well when around her, and not "feeding the fire" but using the validation techniques. It does seem like it's helping as she almost instantly has a mood change, even if just temporary. But it really hits hard when she's not around and my mind wonders. About to go to sleep and hit the reset button for tomorrow, hit up the gym, and possibly go help a friend work on his car and just hang out. Maybe do some fishing if I feel up to it.
This is normal. We all question detachment. We all think it works against us. Here is the thing. What's the alternative? Pursuit? Pressure? Yeah most of us tried that too and managed to push our spouses further away.
Look she's angry at you most likely because the further you back away and give her space, the more she questions her resolve to leave. That angers her. It would be much easier if you pushed her away. Read the pursuit and distance thread. It's a real dynamic. Pursue and watch her flee. Flee and watch her chase.
Feel free to to say to her, a when she's being angry and mean, 'Sorry but I refuse to talk to you if your going to be disrespectful." And then walk away
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
