/journaling to hopefully get this off my conscience
Feeling in a blue mood right now.
Feeling guilty—about what this is doing / will do to our kids. I feel awful that this is at least (partly) my fault—that there may have been something I could have done to change this.
Feeling remorse—about the good times W and I had. They were there, even if it didn’t always come across in my postings. I miss the good times, and wonder if maybe I took those things for granted. That there were times where she was good to me, and to us. Where did I go wrong, and what did I do to deserve this and bring this on us?
It’s hard to not live in the past and the future—which is what I described above (one foot in the past, one in the future).
Go ahead and 2x4 if you must, but this is just where I’m at right now.
