Hurt, that was a great post, keep it up! LH may be right that there is a little denial or wishful thinking going on, so try to be mindful of that and watch for backslides. I mention this story about my sitch now and then but a few months after BD and after S I was feeling awesome and doing great (or so I thought) when seemingly out of nowhere I was slammed with severe depression and anxiety attacks. Within the span of a few days I went from feeling on top of the world to trying to dream up painless ways to commit suicide. My ex went through depression back when S16 was born and she described it as feeling like an empty shell with a black hole inside. That is the best description I can imagine for how I felt. So keep up your PMA but just be careful because you may not be out of the woods yet.
