Hmmm, well yeah that's a tough one. Knowing what you know I would think it would be kind of tough not to be cold towards her, and if you don't say something she's going to wonder what's up and see it as you being passive/aggressive. So I don't think #1 will work. #2, I would say absolutely not. Go for the kids no matter what. #3, probably the best option. But I would put it to her this way- "we planned this vacation 6 months ago and I am going for the kids. I would prefer that you didn't go, but I will leave that choice up to you."
