Lost... sorry you are here. Your H sounds depressed to me... not taking care of himself, wanting to isolate himself. The trips to the bar may be more about self-medicating than an affair. Unfortunately, alcohol makes depression worse. My advice to you is to GAL as much as you can and give him lots of space. He is wanting to run away from any pressure. Has he been to see his doctor? Some antidepressants may help. Counselling in addition to medication is better but really depressed people often don’t want to expend the energy to go to counselling. Does his work offer any employee assistance benefits?
