Hello all, some news here. I know this is a divorce busting forum, but my update is exactly the opposite. Since my last post, two days later I decided to throw in the towel, and agreed to sign a divorce agreement with her at the courthouse. The agreement we came to allowed me to keep the house (that I live in) so I agreed, and it allowed me to work on my real estate investing goals freely. I am officially divorced. This was almost 4 weeks ago. The first week she kept contacting me (to ask random questions etc) then turned into attacking me (saying it's all my fault, im an evil person, i was so bad to her etc etc). So 3 weeks ago I blocked her completely. No communication whatsoever.
I've been feeling great since then (or so I thought - I'll get to that). I don't think about her, I started a much better job and have been really busy with working on my goals. I haven't felt depressed or anxious at all, and being out of her "merry go round" of emotions has really stabilized my life. Yes, now I'm alone and I've accepted it. I don't feel bad about it and I truly am excited about the future. I figured that she hates me and that's that.
Earlier today, I was at my ex-BIL's house (my ex-SIL's husband - I used to work with him) doing some work on the house. He asked me "have you talked to (ex)?" I said "No, I haven't had any contact with her for a few weeks". He said "I want to show you something but don't tell her I showed you" and he sent me a screenshot of her facebook post from this morning. This is what it said word for word "Some nights I remember us, and I try to act strong all the time but I still miss you and need you. Sometimes I so strongly need a hug from you and you to tell me that everything will be ok, and that calm, secure feeling that I could only get from you. It hasn't been easy but I know its for the best for both of us. It's been hard for both of us, I will always wish you the best in life because that's what you deserve. Thank you for the years you dedicated to me, we both grew together, by your side I became a grown, mature woman. I am left with the best memories that we lived together, there were many. I promise from now on I will only remember the best things about you, even though my life will never be the same" Attached were 8 pics of her and I, our wedding day and other random nice pics of the two of us. (BTW, I don't have facebook so I highly doubt she posted it thinking I'd see it, I'm pretty sure she figured I'd never see this post)
I acted like I didn't care, because I really didn't read it in front of him. When I got home I read it over and over and actually started crying. I felt like I was stronger then this. I know it's too late since I am divorced, but it made me second guess my decision to some degree. I know I had to get on with my life, but should I have waited longer? I guess theres nothing I can do now, I just wanted to vent. I just had no idea she felt this way.
