Gordie 23 one year after she dropped the D

[Gordie]

Oneart

Yes, more calm, still some days better than others, but overall better

I find your observation about different MLC types interesting

Your H was a runner

My W wanted to stay put and push me out

Your H prefers not to express himself

My W likes to provide a play by play commentary



Gerda

We used to keep Christian icons around our home as reminders of our faith

When W changed her beliefs all of those icons vanished

But in my mind’s eye I can still look in a corner and see the former icon



Roist

When my patience shovel wears out

I now know where I can get a new one

Agree that we are in the MBR together is a good sign

Even if there are no sexual relations

It is what it is

Negative comments like drops of water

Wow that struck a nerve

From someone who knows

And absolutely trying strike that balance

Of giving her time and space to bake more

While also being strong and true to myself



Over

You are right that tiptoeing around is no fun

It is much better than before but

When I catch myself doing it

I try to stop

It is no way to live



Peace

Thank you for the encouragement



Journaling

So have been thinking of this new wave of criticism

MWD says when w stops complaining it means she has given up

I think that is where w was in the years before BD

So I am looking at these complaints as a good sign

Not fun to be blamed for everything

But at least she cares and has not given up

My old self would escalate and argue

My new self just listens

And sometimes I just have to laugh

Her old complaint was I never cook

Her new complaint is she does not like my cooking

She did not like my long hair so I cut it

Now she does not like my short hair

SMH

And today I got one of the positive signs I was looking for

She actually said thank you for something

Something I do everyday

But it was like she noticed for the first time

One day at a time