Slow Sacred Journey

[sage]

What I have come to accept is that he wants to help ONLY when I am not truly NEEDING the help!!?? It is very confusing but that seems to be the reality. Also, when he sees me attempt a task...putting up a shelf, or starting the barbeque...he will jump in to complete it. But if I first ask, well then he will sit on the request.

Have you read "men are from mars, women are from venus"? He goes into a lot of detail about how it's not just the request for help but how the request is phrased that is key (like, asking "can you do this" is a big no-no apparently whereas "would you do this" is aok). Also, he suggests that men will often say no to the request but then if given time will react positively (the key apparently is not rushing in and rephrasing your request or something or other). Finally, in my own experience, if h interprets my request as something he may FAIL at (like, not live up to my expectations) then he's very resistent to doing it -- even if to me it seems as though it's something he'll succeed at.

I recommend the "Men are from Mars.." book -- it's an interesting men/women dictionary

Sage