Gordie 23 one year after she dropped the D

[Gordie]

Roist

Thank you as always

I am trying to be more positive about things

To keep expectations low

And yes to hold back a while longer

You are right that she still says and does things that communicate she is unsure

I have been praying to release all resentment

When I think I have forgiven

I find I have to forgive a little more

It is a process

And as someone else says

You can be right or you can be married



Journaling

W and I have changed as people

There are things we still like about each other

But there are things we dislike about each other too

W is starting to articulate some of those things she does not like

I listen and try to be receptive

If I try to say anything I dislike about her

It is not met receptively

So I keep those thoughts to myself

After our love making at Christmas

She has distanced herself again physically

We are back in the same bed

But she stays far on her side

And does not want me to touch her

I have focused on non sexual touching

She is more receptive to this

I can give her a hug

I can give her a back rub

She now welcomes this

We can hug or kiss hello or goodbye

W has rejoined family meals

But she does not like my cooking

This is a source of stress

So yes overall things continue to get better

One day at a time