Thanks Steve and MF, your points are well taken. I feel like when I am DBing at my best I oddly don't seem to care about investigating an A. When the feelings of possibly being dissed arise is when I start to get amped-up to investigate.
Great link R2C and yes your comments and suggestions are spot-on.
I think I made my point concisely with W regarding my issues with her behavior, namely the nasty streak, harsh criticism, sarcasm and disrespectful and insulting comments. I know this may not be DBing to the letter but she asked for it. I planted the seed many years ago about this behavior and my suggestion that she ask her family for confirmation that she acted in such ways and to also seek counseling, none of which happened. And it may never.
W has never apologized to me for anything, ever, and it's not her way to admit fault, so I have zero expectations that she will ever really examine herself. Best of luck to the next fella...What I am interested to see is her family's reaction to the D and their comments to me. They have made many comments over the years about her mean streak so I'm guessing they will figure that is playing a role in the D. Not that it matters to the M, but their comments are some cold comfort that I am not insane or overly sensitive.
W made a few of her usual sarcastic jabs at me last night, the kind of stuff there is no reason to say other than to insult and put-down. She can't seem to help herself. I entirely ignored the first remark, which I am liking more and more as a response (the non-response response). After the second biting sarcastic remark, I just smirked a little and shook my head, after which she said "what?", pleading ignorance to how nasty it was. W then said that based on my reaction that she guessed we were not going to be friends. I said not when she talks to me in that way, and I left the room. She called after me twice but I ignored her and moved on with a project, and that was it. She needs some help for sure.
