Your threads are the best Steve, a lot of good info sharing other than keeping a newcomer from umping off a bridge. I feel that once us LBSs get through the initial shock and awe we can really look at our bigger sitch. Yeah there were things we could have done differently in our Ms both H and W, but honestly I think there are just people out there that have bigger issues than NGS, or got bored, etc and one spouse will just always be in hibernation until the next A.
My W too came out of a bad marriage when she met me and I was her knight in shining armor....but at some point she wanted more excitement. Now 19 years later see she probably needed 2 As up to now to chase a fantasy life to escape her depression from being abused as a teen. Looking back and looking now I don't think there is anything I could have done to prevent the As or more in the future. I just look at all the medications W has been on since we met and although maybe just mild anti depressants, there is still unaddressed underlying issues that I/we are not equipped to handle.
However these sitches and our WWs have opened our eyes and had us look within to better ourselves and although painful, I am almost starting to feel thankful that this is happening now while I am still able to look for happiness elsewhere.
H-50 W-48 T-19 M -18 S23, S14 BD - 5/9/2018 OM discovered 5/10/2018
In house sep - 8/18/2018 Rope drop 2/15/2019 R'ing since 3/15/2019
