Sandi, when we talked last week, my instinct/gut feeling told me that she was sincere and telling the truth. It was the first time in almost a year that I saw and heard the woman I fell in love with and her feelings for me felt genuine. And the fact that she keeps bringing up about one every two weeks tells me that not only is she seeing the changes I am making, but it is leaving an imprint on her and clouding her decision of choosing what she wants.
Is she still in contact with OM? Is she engaging in girl gone wild activities?
Look, your anger and vindictiveness could ruin your chances of reconciling. When I read your post describing her words, I saw a woman who had been badly hurt by her H. I'm not excusing her affair, but I understand how a woman can feel lonely and her emotional needs ignored by her H for so long that she loses hope their MR will ever improve. She becomes vulnerable to some other guy that says all the right things and makes her feel special. If she has ended her affair and stopped other wayward activities, she may be at the point of wanting to reconcile. I don't know, I'm just wondering, based on her words.
So, my advice is to ditch your bad attitude and cut out the vindictiveness.........if you want her back. Stop making a point of completely staying away from her when she's home. Speak to her when you see her. Don't be rude and totally ignore her. Share some time in the same room with her. If she sees you not being mad at her, maybe things will make a turn in the right direction.
I got the impression from what she said that perhaps she thinks you are the one currently wanting the divorce, b/c you are so angry at her.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
