Hi everyone. I have been lurking for a while now and finally decided to join and post about my sitch. I have already found some really great advice, so I thought I would try to get some help with my WAW.
We've been together for 13 years, married for 8. We have two sons 5&3. Since my youngest was born we have had a lot of stress, as he is a difficult child. Now I didn't handle the stress well and it took a toll on our relationship. We stopped doing fun things with each other and basically fell into the routine of raising two kids. Now fast forward to early last year, she started to withdraw from me and she began to text a male co-worker constantly. I told her at the time it made me uncomfortable and she stopped texting him as much. I felt like she was in an EA, but she insists they're just friends. I don't believe it's a PA because I've looked in to that.
Then in September she dropped the bomb and told me ILYB and she wanted a divorce. Initially I did all the wrong things, I begged, pleaded, cried, and promised to change. We all know that didn't work. She moved in with her parents in October. She tells me she has no desire to work on the relationship or try to reconcile, but she did agree to go MC. That was something she had mentioned in the past, but I didn't want to go because I didn't believe our problems were that bad (how I wish I would have gone). Just yesterday she told me she deserves to be happy and doesn't see that happening with me. She claims she has tried over the years to work on our relationship and she no longer wants to put in the effort because in her words she doesn't want to have to work hard to love someone.
Since she dropped the bomb, we have hung out several times and spent the holidays together. We got along well, there was no R talk, we just enjoyed each other's company.However, during our last MC session, she said she didn't want to do things together because she didn't want to give me false hope of us getting back together.
At this point, I'm not sure what to do, should I go limited contact and only speak to her about the kids? My only fear with that is one of her complaints on BD was that we never talked and were basically roommates, so would that just be more of the same.
One positive thing is that I have reconnected with old friends and am trying to stay busy. I have also been trying to have fun things planned for the boys when it's my weekend to have them.
I know I have my faults, we all do, but I have begun going to IC to work on my issues and become a better partner, be it with my W or someone else.
