One thing that has continually come up in this DB process and in my sitch is that I believe that one thing that attracted my W and I together was Mutual Emotional Unavailability.

I had several options at the time that my wife and I took a friendship intimate and one girl was really pursuing me hard. This drove me away.
My W just enjoyed my company and the only way that I knew she liked me was when I heard about the stories she told friends when she was out with the girls. I also didn't require much emotionally from her. I knew that she didn't share her feelings which was a blessing and a curse. I should have been more concerned.

Two sick puppies? Perhaps.

Upon initial BD and discovery of her EA I was ready to fix things and get all cuddly etc. She wasn't there. Which really hurt because I had read the dialogs she had had with OM.

M 53 W 54, M since 98
D15, D19
8/2013 discovered EA, W maintained contact with OM
until 10/14
7/2/17 W said she wanted S, 7/25/17 moved out of MBR
12/17 W says moving out 5/18, W still in home.