M - I think we all need something or someone to believe in. Whatever that means to the individual then more power to you!
You know my best friend was going through marital issues the same time as us. His wife ended up staying and he openly admits how lucky he is. He was in the same boat, got the same reasons from her that we all essentially got however she chose to stay, fight though it, and now (according to him) they are better than ever.
After he got his wake up call he dove deep into all the self-help books that we have has well. The difference between him and us was his wife and her desire to not break up their family and kids (which are the same age as ours). She was done, done, and more done. She had moved out and was living with her mom. He has a great job, lives in a million dollar house, in shape, outwardly has many things going for him that we would all be envious of but he was in the same boat as us with a W who wanted nothing to do with him, she was repulsed.
My point is that this is more of a reflection of your W and really less to do about you. Everyone in a relationship has their problems it's just some choose to stay and work through the issues while others choose to bail. I asked her why she chose to stay and she said the thought of rebuilding her life from scratch with a new man who doesn't know her desires, wants, and needs seemed exhausting to her. She also said she couldn't do it to her kids either and she realized there were no guarantees with any other man either. She also said while on a flight she had a random encounter with a pastor/priest that helped her work through what she was experiencing.
My best friend is no different than anyone of us.........he just got lucky.
