Uncertain of What I Have (Thread 4)

[Bo562]

Personally, I would not implement any child plan that requires you to leave the house until the decree is finalized.

This is what I’m thinking / feeling more and more.

I would also start divorce journaling now.

?????? Please explain / clarify.

Is it a true 50/50 parenting split or is there a custodial parent?

I believe it would be 50/50; I’d have to double-check to see if there is a custodial parent, but I do remember something about for taxes her being ‘head of household.’ Different concept, I know.

Can either of you afford your place solo?

Don’t think so. I’ve thought S / D always would be a terrible idea for us, especially financially—but I know it’s not about what either of us think right now. We live in a very good public school system, and it would be good to be here for OS, but....we’ll see.

Its sounds like she wants this to be as amicable as possible which is good. However, you need to be in the mindset of putting yourself and your boys first. You don't have to accept her plan, there may be other options neither of you have thought about. Hopefully, she comes around and it doesnt go to D, but if it does treat it like the most important business transaction of your life, as it very well may be.

Yes, she wants to keep this is amicable as possible—hence doing this plan ahead of time. Also behind her mindset of ‘keeping lawyers out of it as much as possible.’

But at this point I need to keep myself and the boys first.

She admits as much that I don’t have to accept her plan as it is.....and has asked me to review it and ask for changes.

My main question right now is: Why should I have to leave before any S / D is final?

I hope she comes around, too—but like I’ve said, it sure doesn’t feel that way right now.