Just an update. Its been awhile since I posted, mostly because I don’t feel like there have been any major events until recently. The last one was my H getting stabbed back in November, he has recovered and we have been going to MC, up until the holidays. Our son came back for Christmas from boarding school and we went back East to visit our relatives. My FIL fell, broke his femur and had surgery, the entire family visited him a lot and sang carols to him while in his H bed. But he ended up with pneumonia and passed away last Sunday. My H went home and dealt with the morgue, cemetery issues, the will etc. He had a good R with his dad and said everything he wanted to say to him while he was alive. His D had been ill for a long time so this did not come as a surprise.
I do think the silver lining from his dads passing and my H getting stabbed is that his family...siblings, nieces /nephews etc put all theyre pettiness aside (a lot of them were mad at each other for various reasons and not talking) and united and were theyre for each other and supported each other. I know this has been a positive thing for my H, its still not perfect but much better than where they stood before. I was afraid of how my H was going to be when he got home, i.e. more shut down, more depresssed? Irritable, short with me etc. But so far so good, he actually shared a lot with me about how he was feeling, I have been really focusing on trying to listen and let him vent. We have missed a month of MC and start back next week,my H reached out to therapist and made appt, which I am aware of but trying not to judge either way. I have been doing an ok job with GAL. Going to Spanish class and now know my verb conjugations down pat. Getting together with friends, tutoring once a week. I havent been excercising as much. I still am waiting to get my updated cosmetology license so I can get a very part time job in my neighborhood. I have rode the emotional rollercoaster ride like crazy but still have managed to give my H space, i think he is at least still commited to MC for now so that is where we are at. I am feeling good about myself, and like I am slowly getting a new life now that my job as a stay at home mom is over. Baby steps.
