Had a meeting Wednesday like I mentioned before. What a disaster. No detachment on my part at all. I imploded into a blubbering mess. Can't see how that did anything remotely beneficial. More like I jumped off the proverbial cliff. W wouldn't even consider a pause in the proceedings. Even after both L told her that our $$$ is a disaster and at our age retirement should be on our minds. The $$$ will only be worse by doing this. Nothing.
Texted me the next morning something I had a hard time understanding. Her grammar was harder to follow than usual. Boiled down to nope, move on and accept it.
My reply was not that easy. Too much reply?
Anyway I removed my stuff from the bathroom as far as toothbrush, razor, etc. Tired of the games.
What am I not learning God? What lesson do you want me to learn?
Dear Good Sir Turbine,
I don't mean to be crass but did you hear the parable of the drowning man?
You're here for a reason, save yourself. Just from the last journaling alone, it sounds like you want W to wake up and realize the devastation from the financial aspect of D, when she's telling you what she wants. You're very much still in the fog. I can't tell you what to do or not do, but I'll say that I've been raised to have faith, blind faith where it's not based on cause and effect. God does not remove obstacles from your path to make it easier for you, he gives you the strength to go through them and you will be stronger on the other side. It's up to you to find peace in that. It's also up to you to see that maybe he has you here for a reason, and that maybe you should look up at the help he's sent you here...
This is a temporary journey for all of us, one we each have to walk alone. We are given gifts in life and we are ourselves gifts to others. You have family, maybe shift more focus on what you have? Be thankful for that as some don't have that gift. Be thankful you are here, take a moment and listen to what is said.
H 49 , W 47 T 23, M 17 S11, S5 BD: 7/18 IHS: 7/18 - 3/19 Physically Separated: 3/19-4/19 Piecing: 4/19 - Current
