Personally I think MLC is a misnomer. It is not a crises, but a transition. It is a transition that we all necessarily go through (at a certain age) - like Shakespeare 7 stages of man and the transition from young man (stage 4) to middle aged (stage 5). Some of us move into stage 5 kicking and screaming and crises ensues, and others transition smoothly. But we all must go through it. What determines how much damage is caused is how happy we are in ourselves and also, and this is to your point, what our own childhoods were like. Because the transition will make you question everything (who am I, who do I want to be, have I lived my life the way I wanted to, is this the life I want for myself, is this all there is) and if you are unhappy or a person who is prone to unhappiness, then you are in for a hell of ride.
For me, my H's transition has forced a transition on me. I have asked the same questions of myself. And I have come (am coming) out the other side a better, fuller person. I know who I am and I know who I want to be. I have become more spiritual, more mindful and less concerned with the material. To use your words. I am becoming my authentic self.
A quote (as you are an appreciator of quotes ;)) that has seen me through my darkest times and has allowed me to understand myself and also my H better:
“Beauty is truth, truth beauty, —that is all / Ye know on earth, and all ye need to know” (Keats)
For me this quote means, truth, like beauty is in the eyes of the beholder. It is not absolute and it is impermanent. My truth is not his truth. My truth will change with time and understanding. As will his. It also means (and from what I recall from senior school english, this is the accepted meaning) look for beauty in all things because that is where you will find truth. Appreciate beauty because, like truth, it too is impermanent.
