I had an exchange with W last night about transporting S(7) to a party this weekend. I was pretty terse for no apparent reason in telling W I would be handling the event. W commented how my tone was confrontational but that she shouldn't be surprised about that anymore. W says I can't see how I am coming across. I know I need to break this habit. It's not an all-the-time thing but it's counter-productive. It has grown out of years of a toxic communication dance with W involving criticism, defensiveness, and power struggle between and alpha male and alpha female.
I need to tone down the alpha, drop the tug-of-war rope on the power struggle, relax, soften, be pleasant and just be nice to W during the mostly mundane communications. This is my Achilles Heal, my epic 180 challenge. I feel like one instance of me being unnecessarily terse completely wipes out ALL progress with the many other 180's I am doing well with. It's that bad in my mind. It's more of the same to W and it reinforces her decision to D. I feel like I can backslide on a 180 like "Increased Thank You's and Appreciation of W" without a huge effect, but there is no margin for error on my 180 to Defrost and Be Pleasant.
