A familiar story with questions EIGHT

[RR17]

I can only imagine where you are mentally after going at this sitch for as long as you have. That sounds draining. By draining, I mean emotionally tiring. But hopefully you aren't too emotionally attached right now and can find some happiness elsewhere and allow yourself to think through this on how you want to act. You don't sound super fired up, but I can tell you don't want to remain in this sexless marriage. And not only that, not having sex means you aren't connecting on an emotional level too, so I'm sure that's part of your frustration.

Which reminds me, those touch charges...I think that's a great way to take the bull by the horns and spur some positive emotions in both of you. Anything else you can think of? What's her LL?

Thanks ovrrnbw. Sex and physical affection is the missing element in the MR. Yea, it's all draining and everyone here has been through the wringer, but that isn't where I'm coming from on this. Personally, I am in a good place (most of the time). I feel that this is something that I need to take control of. And as well all know there is only one person that we can ultimately control within a relationship. And that is our Ws. Just kidding
Point is I feel like I am approaching this from level headed rational approach.

What's her LL? Well, she has never expressed it but if we love in a way that we like to be loved, I would say acts of kindness. I have done plenty of this. Especially around these holidays.

I just want to point out to others BEWARE the mindset that if you do XYZ for your W that she will feel inclined to reciprocate with sex. They don't operate that way. I used to think this way and never understood why it didn't work that way. Well, I've been reading, as many of you have, and the female mind doesn't treat it like an equitable transaction. Given what I have experienced and come to realize, I believe it. Just know this and watch your expectations.